Feb. 13, 2008

There was a time in Hollywood when you could never be too rich or too thin. Now, you can't be too fertile. But who's telling the stork to fly on by and who's got incubation on the brain? Here's the latest ...

Womb watchers were working overtime at the Grammy Awards when it came to Fergie, with some convinced her canary-colored, curve-suctioned Calvin Klein gown betrayed a hint of a burgeoning belly.

Fergie and Josh snuggle up at the Grammys.

The New York Post jumped onboard the baby train by alleging the "My Humps" singer, who was first hit with knocked up speculation last month, was hoping to get hitched to square-jawed fiancé Josh Duhamel sooner rather than later because of the ostensible baking bun.

"She picked up a wedding dress while she was in New York for Fashion Week and wants to move the wedding up so she is married before the bump becomes too obvious," an insider maintained to the paper, adding that Fergie was sipping only water at a pre-Grammy soiree.

But faster than you can say "OB-GYN," the denials started flying.

"Nope, not at all," her mom, Terri Ferguson, slightly oversold to Ryan Seacrest on his radio show Tuesday. "Did you see her at the Grammys? Skinny, skinny, skinny."

Fergie's rep went for brevity, brushing off the pregnancy reports to People with a simple, "Not true."

As for the couple rushing down the aisle, Mama Fergie told Seacrest that's a bunch of baloney, and insisted they haven't even "met with a wedding planner yet."

She then harrumphed, "I think people can't believe people do get married just because they love each other, not because they are pregnant."

Meanwhile, expectant buzz continues to build around Uma Thurman, who became the target of baby burblings last week after photos seemed to show her carrying a couple of extra ounces on her lithe frame.

Uma and Arpad attend the Nobel Banquet in Oslo on Dec. 10, 2007.

Though her moneybags financier boyfriend, Arpad Busson, dismissed the suspicions, telling the New York Post she had quit smoking, the willowy actress, 37, made her desire for midnight feedings and dirty diapers clear in an interview with the March issue of Redbook.

"I'd like more children. I asked the doctor, she said there's still time," fesses up Uma, whose ex-husband, Ethan Hawke (they have two kids together), is awaiting a bundle of joy with their former nanny. "I still have the sippy cups."

Speaking of time, Janet Jackson isn't worried that her biological clock is ticking louder than Big Ben.

"I get so much pressure from people I don't even know, and I think: 'My God, am I missing my moment?' Even my mother mentioned something to me the other day," the 41-year-old popster confesses to the London Guardian. "But now you can have your eggs frozen and there are all sorts of things you can do. I've still got time so I think I'm OK."

Besides, adds Janet, who has been dating pocket-size music producer Jermaine Dupri for five years, "I've got to get a little more kid out of me first before I move on and be childish with my child."

Yeah, good luck with that.

Perhaps Janet will follow the lead of Marcia Cross, who says she looked into several options to becoming a mom before finding success with in vitro fertilization (twin girls Eden and Savannah arrived in February of last year).

"In my early 40s, I considered adoption, and I tried getting pregnant on my own through a sperm donor," the actress, 45, reveals in the March issue of Health, "but neither worked out."

Also not working out are Chelsea Handler's attempts at humor. The purported comedian's unfunny streak continued this week when she tried to zing Jenny McCarthy by intimating she was carrying the spawn of boyfriend Jim Carrey.

"And by the way, Jim, Jenny wanted me to tell you -- she's pregnant," she announced on her E! show "Chelsea Lately" on Tuesday.

The would-be witticism prompted McCarthy's rep to offer Us an immediate uterine status update, insisting, "She is not pregnant."

Madonna and Gwyneth chat at the Raising Malawi Benefit in New York on Feb. 6.

And finally, Gwyneth Paltrow is contemplating the expansion of her brood, although she may be considering a different plan than having "two in a row, really quick again," as she told the Daily Mail last month.

The mom of Apple, 3, and Moses, 1, blabs to the Associated Press that she and husband Chris Martin are thinking about taking a cue from pal Madonna (and Angelina Jolie, Meg Ryan, Hugh Jackman and a multitude of other celebs) by adopting.

"People who have a lot also often feel like they have a lot to give," says Gwyn. "I have a good friend who always says that if you're a person of means at all then you have to adopt because there are so many kids in the world who need homes."

Including, it seems, those that live just a subway ride away from her deluxe Manhattan digs.

"We might get one from Brooklyn," she hints to the New York Daily News (and yes, we think this was just an unsuccessful attempt at levity, not an indication that she treats an addition to her family the same way as, say, ordering takeout or shopping for furniture). "No baby is more helpless than another baby. And I'm a New York girl."

Paltrow also waves off her brief hospitalization last month, which sparked pregnancy chatter and culminated with Martin getting physical with a paparazzo.

"I feel great," she tells the paper (her pal, chef Mario Batali, told Us it was "a little gastrointestinal situation"). "People made a big deal out of nothing."

Next: Brit Bits: Teaching, Mom Time ... and Marriage?