Someone give Victoria Beckham her own lifestyle TV show already. In a chat with British Vogue, the permanently stiletto-clad Posh Spice pokes fun at her top-heavy, size triple-zero body. "I would never put my health at risk. Obviously working out is important," she begins, before cheekily declaring, "Well, I don't. I have joined a gym, but I can't bring myself to start. What do you wear on the running machine? I can't bring myself to wear flat shoes." Mrs. Beckham also has some anti-Cinderella advice for when you find that perfect pair of toe-crunching heels only to discover they don't have your size: "I just stick toilet paper in -- if that's what it takes to get a nice shoe."

Hayden Panettiere at a Candie's party in Los Angeles on Feb. 21

We'd probably worry a whole lot less about Hayden Panettiere if she'd stop talking about how she's not going to turn into another Hollywood cautionary tale. "I think people look at me as just another one of those girls who's going to screw up, like, 'She's going to get into drugs, and she's going to get into parties,'" the 18-year-old "Heroes" starlet tells the April issue of Cosmopolitan. "I have an occasional glass of champagne when I'm celebrating something, but generally, I don't drink. I'm a pizza-and-a-movie girl." At least Panetierre doesn't seem to be suffering from any pesky self-esteem issues, which should serve her well in the coming years. "I don't have a model's body," she acknowledges. "But I'm not one of those crazy girls who thinks that they're fat. I'm okay with what I have. I can rock this body, you know?" Odds are her co-star honey Milo Ventimiglia agrees. "I need somebody who is very secure," says Hayden, who was first linked to the 30-year-old actor in September. "In this business, I'm constantly standing next to gorgeous people. My job is to make out with [attractive] men. Like, hello, who wouldn't be completely threatened by that? But at the end of the day, you have to realize that it's just a job."

Katie Holmes inadvertently benefited from Lindsay Lohan's many troubles, but she's probably not gonna be too happy over the connection. In a New York Times piece that delves into how a glam spread in a fashion mag can rehabilitate a star's dinged image, Robert Green, the executive producer of "Mad Money," reveals how he originally considered the twice DUI-busted, thrice-rehabbed starlet for Holmes' role in the quickly forgotten chick flick. But he said the prospect "was made moot by the fact that at the time she was not insurable." That led him to cast Mrs. Tom Cruise opposite Diane Keaton and Queen Latifah. "I told myself, 'O.K., let's call Katie Holmes,'" says Green. "She may have a weird personal life, but nobody thinks she's not going to show up on time."

Next: Britney's Disturbing Deliveries, Sitcom Role