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All reviews by Biff86
0 out of 0 users found this helpful  Legion of Doom...
Posted: 1/25/2010A review of Legion by Biff86
Had the Syfy channel pumped out this movie, I would have applauded the campy, cheap aplomb. The trouble is that I paid good money to see it in the theater. I wished I would have stayed home and watched the Syfy channel... Legion has a great cast but bad writing does not a good movie make. The storyline is strained at best and the dialog made me wreath in agony. One of the main characters is named Jeep... JEEP! Paul Bettany does a great job of keeping a straight face as Archangel Michael when he says he has hope in humanity because of Jeep! Was that product placement dollars at work? Good thing Hostess didn't sponsor the film... "I have cut off my wings and will incur the wrath of God because of your humanity, Twinkie." I'd say save yourself the money and wait until it comes out as a rental, but I wouldn't even waste my money then. Wait until it comes out on the Syfy channel for free, which should be in about 7 1/2 minutes.
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0 out of 1 users found this helpful  Battle Field Earth... Move Over!
Posted: 1/11/2008A review of In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale by Biff86
It's official - In the Name of the King is the worst movie I have ever seen in my life. It was so horrific, the audience (myself included) laughed hysterically over what was supposed to be the most serious parts. I'm in shock! To complain about In the Name of the King would be like complaining about a train wreck or a ruptured spleen. Don't go see it. Don't rent it. Pretend it never existed.
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1 out of 1 users found this helpful  Crap of the Titans
Posted: 4/3/2012A review of Wrath of the Titans by Biff86
Spend too much on special effects and too little on the script and what you end up with is a mediocre sequel with no depth or heart. There was such potential - interesting characters, monsters, gods... but instead it was just a romp through FX land. Enough with the special effects - they're suppose to enhance the story, not replace it.
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0 out of 0 users found this helpful  Kick-Crass
Posted: 4/19/2010A review of Kick-Ass by Biff86
I never considered myself "prude" but I didn't enjoy watching an eleven-year old girl violently killing people, even in the name of justice. The idea of Joe Average standing up for something is a good message in an age of passive text and youtube mongers, but the gratuitous violence and vulgarity that followed did not make a good film in my opinion. It felt contrived, and nothing we haven't seen before, just dressed up in youthful clothing. Stand alone, the main character falls short of holding interest and the "side" kicks wind up stealing the show. When you find yourself laughing because someone gets killed by a bazooka, you have to ask yourself "Have I let my dropped my expectations for interesting entertainment a little too far?"
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